Let's face it, middle school is a tough time. The hours of homework, emails to and from teachers, constantly checking grades and the planner to make sure everything is getting turned in on time.. And that is just for ME! But seriously, I remember middle school being terrible. Socially. Academically, Physically.. it all sucked. There is a good chance I cried after school about 50% of the days from school stuff and then another 25% of the days cuz of family stuff. I thought it was just because my classmates remained essentially the same from second through eighth grades, We were like siblings - all 16 of us picked on, fought with, and fiercely protected one another. A perfect example was between Peter (alias) and I. He LOOOOVED all things Nirvana. played guitar, had the coolest curly hair, and once asked me to be his girlfriend then recanted just hours later. I, conversely was obsessed with Boyz II Men, had stick straight hair and huge bifocal glasses. The thing was, our school had a no "band t-shirt" policy. Being the angelic middle schooler I was, I promptly alerted administration when he wore a Nirvana "band" t-shirt, and in the end, we both were prohibited from wearing shirts featuring our favorite singing groups, because he was persuasive in arguing that while Boyz II Men didn't play instruments, the spirit of the rule should be taken into account. Ugh! I couldn't even be that mad at him. He was right! Now, with our third, and youngest, kid in 7th grade, I can see that the suck-fest that I remember is just how it is. I can see similar things happening in our son's life as he tries to navigate peer pressure, insecurity, a social life, extra curricular activities, hormones, and hygiene. Not to mention the switching from class to class, staying organized, being responsible, and trying to be independent while also needing us and his mom. While he doesn't talk on the phone all evening with friends about nothing with the possibility of a parent picking up another line and listening in, there is plenty of "talking" between gaming, DMs, texting and Facetime. How these tweens cope with all of the pressure of technology, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter and other outlets feeding them with how to be cool on top of whats happening in school is beyond my comprehension. Now more than ever I am seeing how important it is to set priorities and good habits. These skills are crucial for his academic, professional, and relationship success in the future. As a tutor to many students who did not have accountability at home when they were this age, I happen to know that it is really tough to teach older dogs new tricks. Lucky for me, our son's mom is open to communication and wants to have harmony between the homes. So, while there is a lot that is different from when we were kids because of technology and marketing, a lot really is the same. Both of our homes agree about these things.. Kids today still need to learn:
Parents today still need to learn:
I've read some amazing books over the years that help keep the whole attitude in perspective, and they have helped me tremendously. Here are a list of just a few of my favorites:
* I am never compensated for my thoughts and suggestions for resources. This is just a list of books that have helped me.
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AuthorI'm Michelle, and I've got a full plate! As a full-time dietetics student, step-mom, wife, study coach, and tutor in my late 30's, some days I'm barely scraping by. But, no matter what is on my plate, it's always gluten free! Categories
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August 2020
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